How to Respond to Verbal, Emotional Abusers

It looks like June Hunt has read our book! She espouses the condensed version of our respect me rules! Yea, its catching on. and best of all, she uses the Bible to back this up. Things are definitely getting better with Christianity and abuse!

How to Respond to Verbal, Emotional Abusers: "Six-Step Strategy to Stop Abuse
To curtail the abuse, Georgia needed a plan. "You can't change someone else, but you can change yourself so that the abusive tactics are no longer effective." I shared with her the following six-step strategy:
#1: Clearly state what you are willing to accept and are not willing to accept from the abuser.
Communicate your position in positive terms. Keep your statement short and succinct. Don't justify and don't apologize. Simply state your boundaries.
"I want our relationship to continue, but I'm not willing to listen to name calling. … I'm not willing to hear your accusations. … I'm not willing to endure any longer the onslaught of profanity.""

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Respect-Me RULES - WEB-MIX

There's a new thing on the internet and I kinda like it. It's called a web mix and is a series of square (tiles) that are icons and link to various topics or items of interest. symbaloo is hosting the webmix for respect-ME RULES--it has all the things our web site has, but it's located on one page--the web-mix! take a look and see if you like it--you can even earn your certificate in Verbal Abuse Defense by clicking on the "S" then the "p" through "t"--fun--tell us what you think.

Respect-Me RULES - Symbaloo: "About this webmix : Verbal & Emotional Abuse can be stopped by understanding and using a few basic self respect principles. We show you how to change the way you think about abuse, how you respond, and how to stop it in its tracks. Earn a certificate in Verbal Abuse Defense by clicking on the "s" then"

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Keri Hilson On Twitter, 'Years Of Verbal Abuse... Enough Is Enough!'

Wow--I just love it when people know how to respect themselves and stand up for themselves--right on Keri! Here is something she posted (you can read the whole story by clicking through  and I support this women--more of us need this kind of courage.

Keri Hilson Has Mini Breakdown On Twitter, 'Years Of Verbal Abuse... Enough Is Enough!': "It’s TOO much!! Please! Is everything I tweet gonna be “intentionally misinterpreted” as a statement abt someone/drama I know nothing about? You have no idea what your hateful words could do to someone’s spirit. Years of verbal abuse from strangers all day long. Enough is enough! I’m here for MY FANS! I’m stronger than you imagine, but waking up/goin to bed to your ugliness is just TOO MUCH, kids. I get it, ok? You can stop now. As far as WHATEVER ur really mad about, I had my reasons. It’s been yrs! Just chalk it up to your ignorance of my reality and LET…IT…GO."

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You-are-a-Target Workshop is Streamlined and simple!

Good news regarding the "You are a Target" verbal abuse workshop. It has been streamlined with Section "completion forms" at the end of each section. You can fill them out online and submit with a simple push of a button to get your assignments in.

When you complete all 4 assignments, you earn a Certificate of Completion which is signed by Dr. Marshall and emailed to you. You no longer need a password for Section 3 and 4.

Before the upgrading,  a number of participants got lost in cyberland. However, the files have been recovered and we can send the certificate with just a quick check of our records.

If you already went through the workshop, check to see if you completed each section--and if not, you can do it now. Other wise, get started today. Click here.

Section 1 Defining the Problem:
Section 2 The Miracle Principle:
Section 3 What are the 12 Respect-me RULES?
Section 4 Closure

If you completed them, please reply to this email and request your Certificate of Completion (be sure to give us your name)--or simply send in the completion forms at the end of the sections you missed and we will get your participation logged and send out your certificate.

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Signed, Dr. Mike and Shelly

time to weigh in on violence against women act.

Although I applaud the Violence Against Women act for attempting equalize the playing field between men beating the crap out of women--I am sick that they are now encouraging women to play "victim" with verbal and emotional abuse -are you kidding me???? it is a federal crime now to verbally abuse your partner--the same partner,  as we know here at Your Are A Target--that wimp and whine and give their power away to their mates? Now when women get their feelings hurt they can prosecute their mate?

Attorneys are already jumping on the band wagon to encourage women to take advantage of this new sickening part of the law--instead of teaching women that no one can verbally abuse them unless they allow it--instead of giving women back their power--they have stripped them of their dignity--encourage them to break up their families and blame blame blame. Wow--we should be teaching girls and women that they are strong--not calling them victims and showing them how to punish and blame their partners---

Here's one attorney jumping on the band wagon--and exploiting families:

The Law Offices of Gary J. Kim - Related Immigration Articles - VAWA Waiver & I-751 Abuse Waiver: "Those who suffered mental abuse, verbal abuse or emotional abuse can self-petition through VAWA without evidence of physical abuse.

In order to prove abuse, many forms of evidence are accepted by the USCIS. A police report or hospital report may serve as clear evidence that the victim has suffered some form of physical, mental or verbal abuse. In addition, an independent report from a social services agency, an independent report from a psychologist, a support letter from minister or pastor and affidavits from friends and family members who witnessed the abuse can serve as evidence of abuse."

In addition to throwing millions of women into the victim position VAWA also has other serious flaws:

VAWA has increased prosecution rates of domestic violence cases, but there is little conclusive evidence that it has significantly reduced the incidence of violence. According to the Department of Justice (DOJ), the rate of intimate partner violence dropped 64% between 1994 and 2010, a drop pro-VAWA policymakers largely attribute to the law. But this decrease happened at the same time violent crime as a whole fell dramatically nationwide, making it hard to know whether a drop in domestic violence might have happened without the policies adopted under VAWA. Read more:

And there are a multitude of reasons this act will hurt women which you can read here: http://womenagainstvawa.org/

Women need to stop verbal abuse themselves by learning not to let their partners walk on them--they don't need to be blaming their partners for what they allow in their lives--this new expanded part of the law will serious set women back in taking back their power.

I am sick about it.



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