Saturday, September 30, 2006

Breast Cancer Strategies; Domestic Abuse Unnoticed

Breast Cancer Strategies; Domestic Abuse Unnoticed: "When asked to define what actions comprise domestic violence and abuse, 2 in 5 Americans did not mention hitting, slapping and punching, a Sept. 21 study commissioned by Liz Claiborne Inc. found. Over 90 percent failed to define repeated emotional and verbal abuse, sexual abuse or controlling behaviors as patterns of domestic violence."

Friday, September 22, 2006

Is your workplace toxic?

Bosses who bully are as bad as onyone who who bullies--but remember, you are a arget--NOT a victim and as such you have more control than you think. Take this test and go read the article--enlightening! | Bosses Who Bully: Levine: 22 September 2006: "Is Your Workplace Toxic?

Examples of Workplace Bullying (Source: CCOHS)

* Spreading malicious rumors, gossip, or innuendo that are not true
* Excluding or isolating someone socially
* Intimidating a person
* Undermining or deliberately impeding a person's work
* Physically abusing or threatening abuse
* Removing areas of responsibilities without cause
* Constantly changing work guidelines
* Establishing impossible deadlines that will set up the individual to fail
* Withholding necessary information or purposefully giving the wrong information
* Making jokes that are 'obviously offensive' by spoken word or e-mail
* Intruding on a person's privacy by pestering, spying, or stalking
* Assigning unreasonable duties or workload in a way that creates unnecessary pressure
* Underwork--creating a feeling of uselessness
* Yelling or using profanity
* Criticizing a person persistently or constantly
* Belittling a person's opinions
* Unwarranted (or undeserved) punishment
* Blocking applications for training, leave, or promotion
* Tampering with a person's personal belongings or work equipment"

Gas Station Chain To Provide Help For Domestic Abuse Victims

I love this!!!! a community actualy doing somethng to support the targets! Now how can we work verbal abuse into this?

WAVE 3 TV Louisville, KY :: Gas Station Chain To Provide Help For Domestic Abuse Victims: "GasAmerica developed the signs with Alternatives Incorporated, a company that provides services and shelter for women and children who have suffered from domestic violence.

The red signs read, 'Safe Haven -- if you are in an abusive situation, use our phone to call for help.'

The signs include phone numbers for shelters and for local law enforcement. Cards providing advice on how to leave an abusive situation will also be placed in restrooms."

Friday, September 15, 2006

Trash Talking and Verbal Smacks

I ran across this today—something that guys learn from watching NFL—and we wonder why our men think that it is ok to abuse us verbally. What is trash talk?

When it comes to trash-talking, the key is to put your mind, mouth in the gutter: "Trash talking, a part of foo
tball long before helmets had facemasks, is a form of psychological gamesmanship intended to disrupt an opponent's concentration — and it's a game played on high school football fields every weekend."

Where is trash talk learned?
Travis head coach Jerry Sanders said trash talking is "human nature." Kids are exposed to it by watching SportsCenter or NFL highlights.

Is trash talk or verbal smacking allowed infootball?

According to the NCAA football rulebook, trash talking falls under the category of unsportsmanlike conduct. Texas high school referees, who use the NCAA manual, look for "any act that interferes with orderly administration on the part of players, coaches and persons subject to the rules."

So, unsportsmanlike conduct is called against players or coaches who point fingers at opponents, taunt or ridicule an opponent.

Does trash talking work?

"The worse a team is, the more they talk," Dunn said. "I remember when we beat Reagan 78-18 a few years ago, they were talking trash the whole game."

Read the article. It's illuminating. Verbal abuse is trash talking and verbal smacks--high scholl boys learn it is the thing to do to win, EVEN THOUGH IT IS FROWNED ON!

What happens in the homes they thenlive in--they begin trash talking their wives and girlfrinds--does it work? As long as we let them do it, it does.

RESPECT Yourselves--don't let ay one trash talk you--they will do it if you let them.

Tuesday, September 5, 2006

The Financial Penalty for Spousal Abuse

Bravo JOANNA GROSSMAN, for a great article and more insight into state law and spousal abuse. I commend New York for considering "other" circumstances.

FindLaw's Writ - Grossman: The Financial Penalty for Spousal Abuse A New York Judge Ups the Ante, By Awarding All Marital Property to the Abuse Victim: "Last week, New York Judge Jacqueline Silbermann sent a strong message to abusive spouses. In the case of DeSilva v. DeSilva, she ruled, in a divorce, that a wife was entitled to one hundred percent of the couple's marital property because her husband had verbally and physically abused her. "

I think it's time for states to re-evaluate what no-fault meand and how it actually impacts a divorce.

When I divorced in Washington State, my husband had begun an affair with my 17 year old daughter (his step daughter). When I went to the police and child protective services in Newport, WA, I was told that she was over 16 and could sleep with anyone she wanted. I filed for divorce and had an attorney that told me I would have to pay my husband maintenance because he was on disability and my income potential was greater. Since my husband and daughter were living together, that amounted to paying them to have sex.

This was so unacceptable to me that I fired that attorney (male) and found a female attorney who said she would not let that happen. So horrible were the circumstances, I could not believe it when I was told I could not even mention the fact in court that my husband and daughter were sleeping and living together and suing me to pay them maintenance. I could not fathom what the states were thinking with “no fault” and “equal distribution!”

My attorney was so good that it worked out and I retained all the marital property, including his retirement (that I had funded), but only because my attorney bended things and found legal loopholes and happened to be smarter than his attorney.

I hope that other states will consider that everything is NOT equal in many cases and that spousal abuse (not necessarily physical) can be egregious. And when egregious, the innocent party should be compensated.

Friday, September 1, 2006

Women's motorcycle club rallies for thousands of abused women

I love it when we stick together!

The Beaufort Gazette: Women's motorcycle club rallies for thousands of abused women: "Wednesday, a women's motorcycle club rallied together to donate toasters, bookshelves, mattresses, toiletries, towels, socks and school supplies to the shelter -- a small step in helping the eight women and 12 children living there jump-start their lives."