Someone writes in that her "good" husband is angry all the time. Well being angry all the time is abusive--what a horrible way to live. My ex was angry all the time--and he took his anger out on me. He used to say after he tore something up or destroyed some or punched a hole in the wall, "I hate it when this happens because then you focus on what I did and not on what you did to cause it."
I hated it that he thought I caused his anger! People are responsible for their own feelings and if they try to make you responsible, then they get abusive, or whiny, and certainly co-dependent. How does anger look in your relationships--is it healthy, "Ooh, I'm pissed I dropped that dang rock on my foot," or is it "Son of a B--why did you distract me and make me drop this on my foot."
The second response means you have an abusive spouse. read the story here:
Verbal abuse damaging to children - Times Union: "DEAR ABBY: My husband is a hard worker, a good provider and a good dad. However, he's angry all the time. It has been this way for as long as I can remember. He is aware of it, and always promises me that when this or that settles down, things will get better, but they never do."
'via Blog this'