Sunday, March 13, 2016

A Mini Lesson in Right and Wrong in Abusive Relationships

A mini lesson in right and wrong in abusive relationships.

Abusive Relationships: "The abuser The abusing person may have particular characteristics, such as: Believing they are always right (and others are wrong)."

Yes, abusers often believe they are right and you are wrong--but then you believe you are right and they are wrong!

Got news for you--it's relative. Take the right and wrong out of the relationship equation--replace it with what works. What works for you is right for you, what works for them is right for them. But if what works for them is NOT right for you, only you can change that equation. You have the right to be wrong.

An abusive partner will insist that you are wrong (it doesn't matter about what--you are just wrong) and that you must "admit" that and conform to their version of the issue. You can go along to get along, but with a real abuser, the next week they are likely to reverse their position and claim you don't remember what they said. They insist you do one thing this week and then the opposite the next and you are always wrong in their eyes. That is how it works. You can not logic with them or please them because they will make you wrong no matter what.

So how do you change them? You don't. How do you make them see what they have done? You don't. How can you prove that they told you the opposite last week? You can't. This is abuse.

Is there a way to protect yourself? Yes, many ways--but it doesn't involve changing them. It is centered in setting boundaries and enforcing them. For this lesson, forget right and wrong--YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE WRONG. Let them know this--get the message across that they can be right all they want and make you wrong in their eyes--but that the right and wrong message won't work on you any longer because even if you are wrong (they won't be convinced otherwise) you have that right.

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Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Kesha's Response To The Dr. Luke Contract Verdict Takes Time To Thank her Fans

This is one of those deals where you don't know the truth--a he said, she said kind of thing. However I tend to believe Kesha. Of course it could be an act... but as Hilary says, we should believe the woman. I do feel bad for her and yet she has a lot of support. Each of us that has been abused has more support than we know. Look for it!

Kesha's Response To The Dr. Luke Contract Verdict Takes Time To Thank her Fans — PHOTO | Bustle: "Additionally, at the time the allegations came to light in October 2014 — Kesha filed a lawsuit against Gottwald accusing him of sexual and verbal abuse — Gottwald to countersued Kesha in response, claiming it was a tactic on the singer's part to get out of her contract. As the complaint in his suit read, "As part of the effort to get out of the Gottwald Recording Agreement, Kesha and Pebe have also orchestrated a campaign of publishing false and shocking accusations against Gottwald to extort Plaintiffs into letting Kesha out of the Gottwald Recording Agreement.""

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